 Patty O´Furniture, A&S ´08, pictured shortly before he was discovered on the floor of his dorm in a stupor, his radio tuned in to campus radio station WZBC.
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The Boston College Police Department responded to an emergency call by the resident assistant in Kostka Hall yesterday morning. A mind numbing, high decibel sound was heard coming from Kostka 111, the room of Patty O'Furniture, A&S '08. Upon forced entry into the room, the officers found O'Furniture passed out on his floor dressed in a leprechaun outfit. He was taken to the Infirmary via cruiser.
After being admitted to the Infirmary, the nurses decided that there was something wrong with O'Furniture. He was sent via ambulance to St. Elizabeth's Medical Center. Through the use of a urine test it was determined that O'Furniture had ingested several types of barbiturates, hallucinogens, and a form of horse tranquilizer found only in Mexico.
O'Furniture is recovering well despite the massive amount of drugs found in his system at the time of admission to St. Elizabeth's. Officers determined that the WZBC radio broadcast he was listening to was only bearable to his human ears because of the influence of the drugs in his system. This also explains the lack of a response when his roommate smacked him with a hockey stick in an attempt to wake him from his comatose state.
O'Furniture had no recollection of even owning a radio when The Depths spoke to him about the incident. He has also issued a public statement announcing his embarrassment for having been found listening to WZBC. Those closest to O'Furniture are not surprised by him being found wearing a leprechaun outfit as it was his tradition to don such an outfit on a Wednesday night. "He always enjoyed prancing around pretending to be the leprechaun from Notre Dame," said Abe Froman, A&S '08.
This incident is one in a string of WZBC related disturbances. In the past few weeks incidents have ranged from a student believing he was an actual eagle and hopping off the parking garage to a student who believed that one of Che Chi's sausages was trying to eat him. The BCPD is taking this matter seriously as WZBC has been found to be dangerous to an individual's physical and mental stability.
In a statement to The Depths, Boston College Police Chief Robert Morse urged all students and faculty "to use extreme caution when tuning into 90.3 FM on their radios." Morse went on to recommend that nobody listen to WZBC while operating a car or any other motorized form of transportation.
WZBC is no stranger to judicial action. Last year it was believed that the remains of Jimmy Hoffa were buried under the WZBC studio. In an effort to conceal this development, WZBC announced it to its regular audience. We must further explain WZBC's regular audience. Ratings have shown that the only radios routinely tuned into WZBC are found at the aquarium in downtown Boston. Fish keepers there say the din of the station helps the 100-year-old sea turtles retire each night after being photographed by students on school trips.
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